The thing is though, we might know about forgiving and being merciful, but do we really understand the power it offers, not only to help others, but to help ourselves.
St Augustine once said something along the lines of forgiveness happening when we "surrender our natural desire for revenge".
What that means is that to forgive, which as I've written before is key to being able to move on with life, we must first be willing to offer mercy.
Being merciful means that we are willing to drop any anger or hurt we have against someone, and love them for who they are. We must accept that like us, they are flawed and will make mistakes sometimes. We don't always have to agree with them and we can fight for our rights and beliefs, but at the end of the day, we understand those around us are valued by God and so we should value them as well.
Our soon to be Blessed Paul VI said it well when he proclaimed "Anger is like throwing a stone into a wasp nest."
If you're angry at someone, something or even at yourself, you are more likely to experience negative effects from it, like you would if you threw a stone into a wasps nest and thousands of wasps tried to sting you.
We must realise as people that we don't need that kind of pain and we don't deserve it. God wants us all to live happy and fulfilled lives, but we won't be able to do that if we are angry and aren't willing to be merciful.
Here's five ways to stop increase your ability to show mercy in your life:
- See others values, not their faults.
- Be willing to accept when you make a mistake, it's ok, you are human and that's a part of this fact. The key is to learn from the mistakes and grow.
- Start seeing things from others views, rather than just your own.
- Be kind and supportive of others before your needs.
- Read about those of greatness and humility. Their stories normally will help you see what's really important.
Once we are being merciful, then we are more likely to see reason to forgive for the mistakes we make. In my opinion no one can try to forgive before they experience mercy, that's like trying to walk through a glass door before you've opened it.
After mercy comes forgiveness. Now forgiveness is important because it's ok to be merciful but if we don't forgive as part of that, no matter how much we might want to say we are being merciful, it will be hard as there will be past hurts and pains to challenge our decisions when it comes to mercy.
We need to clear out those past pains and hurts and the only way we can do that is by forgiving those who hurt us. Doesn't have to be face to face (although that'd be great), just as long as you do it. Every step you take is one step closer to moving on and being able to live life on your terms, free of the past.
Here's five important things to remember when looking at forgiveness?
- Have I been hurt by others or by something I did that didn't work out?
- Am I willing to accept that tomorrow is a new day and I ain't letting this get me down?
- Have I looked at the bible and seen the forgiveness Jesus has for us?
- Do I want to forgive or am I still grieving over the issue?
- If I do want to forgive, what am I doing about it?
Our own Lord's prayer- the Our Father has the line "as we forgive those who trespass against us", now if that's not a sign of the importance of forgiveness, then I don't know what is.
Furthermore however, forgiving yourself and others and showing mercy in all situations will lead to less stress, more social interaction and overall better health.
Don't believe me, then check out this video...
So why not give a little bit of thought to being merciful and working to forgive yourself and others this week for the mistakes in life, not only will it free them and help them to move on, but more importantly, it will do the same for you.
Life isn't meant to be lived in the mistakes of the past, it's lived in the greatness of the now!
Till next time..
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