The 5 key things you need to survive the storm

Hi everyone,

So I promised you something life changing a few days ago and hopefully here it is.

In the last post I talked to you about why we need to sail through a storm rather than just avoid it - now I'm here to give you five things you need to do just this.

These however are not only important when it comes to overcoming challenges in life - they also will change the way you view the world and possibly make your life very different to what it is now.

1. Belief- first and foremost, you need to believe that you can overcome the challenge. You won't get past a tough situation if you can't see that there could be an end in sight. As humans, we hate the unknown and we'd rather be in a bad situation then go to an unknown that could be even worse. It's why it's so important to make sure you have stored in your mind a belief you can overcome any challenge. Even if when the challenge arises, you feel you can't overcome it, just knowing that you've trained your mind to think you can will make the process of working to overcome it easier.


2. Pride- now I know, there are plenty of post in this blog alone that talk about the danger of being filled with pride. In this case however, pride isn't a bad thing to have, when used correctly. Being proud of who you are as a person is key to gaining the confidence and belief to overcome challenges. If we aren't proud of who we are, then we can get lost in trying to be someone else or being favoured by others, which in a time of challenge, can lead us astray from the simple path out of the wilderness. We need to stay strong in our values and be proud of the person we are, flaws and all.
   


3. Humility- alongside pride however, we also need to have some humility. Want to know why so many great explorers died while exploring - and it wasn't because they weren't good enough! They perished because they weren't humble enough to know their limits and to seek out help when their abilities couldn't take them any further. When you're in a challenge and you don't know where to turn to, be brave enough to say that and seek the advice of those who you trust and who can build your confidence, or who have been through it before and can help you out of the mire.


4. Support- Of course, in order to seek out people for advice and confidence building, you have to have support around you in the first place. I think it is paramount that whether you are in a challenge or not, that you have a group of people around you at all times to help you with your life. As someone who for many years was a solo eagle - I know from plenty of experience that this is not the way to go, and that having support is key to success, especially when overcoming storms in life. Sometimes, having someone to talk to will clear the bad weather before it brews into a storm. Other times, having someone to talk to make travelling through the storm a little easier. Either way, if you ain't got a support network around you yet - now is the time to do so.


5. Patience- ah good old patience. Something I know I'm always in need of more of and really one
   
   of the more vital keys to surviving the storms of life. So often, we see a problem and we want to solve it straight away, then when we don't, we get downhearted and we need the other four keys mentioned above to get out of the storm. The truth is though, if we had just had the patience to know storms in life occur and taken measured steps rather than panicked and tried to solve our problem in 10 seconds, there's a good chance we'd have overcome the storm a lot sooner as our calm, clear thought processes would have steered us away from feelings and closer to the facts of the situation. So take my advice here, the moment you get into a storm in life, take a deep breath and look at what really matters - yes I know it takes time, but this patience could save you a lot of heartache.

So there you have it, five keys to overcome the storms of life and hopefully in the long run, make your life as great as it can be.

Till next time...

It's time to take on the storms in life

Hi everyone,

Have you ever tried to avoid a storm when you need to go somewhere? If you have, then chance are that you'd quickly realise that it's not an easy thing to do.

Sure you can go inside and be safe from it, but it will still hit the surrounding areas and have some impact on your life, even it is only that it delays you from where you were going.

Then there's the option to try to run away from it. While that's feasible in short stages, the problem with it is that you will most likely either have the storm follow you or, if you do avoid it at the time, another storm will come and you'll have to run again, constantly running from the weather to avoid it and never getting to where you needed to be.

Just like the weather, the storms in our lives - whether they are caused by loss, tragedy, lack of belief or circumstances we can't control - can have a severe impact on who we are and how our lives pan out.

All too often, people avoid moments or don't do what they know needs to be done as they feel that in doing this, they avoid the storm that is to hit if they keep going forward and face the challenges in their lives. Problem is though, just like the weather, they are either left stranded or the same/a similar problem arises hours, days or weeks later and the issue is never resolved.

So just what should we do when a storm hits. Well - as much as I hate to say it, when a storm hits, the best thing to do is to batten down the hatches and go straight through it and today, I'm going to give three reasons as to why.

1. If you go through a storm, while it may seem to be a destructive and at times terrifying process, you will always gain something out of it. While it's easy to think about how a storm can destroy or knock out power lines, it's sometimes harder, but just as true to say that they bring families closer together through time spent stuck at home, they unite people as they fight to help those affected and they make us all realise what's important. The same goes with storms of life - sometimes God shakes things up in our lives not because he want to cause chaos, but because we need a reminder of what's important and how much we need to draw back to him. Next time a storm comes in life, rather than seeing a negative, work to find the lessons to be gained.


2. Storms remind us that there are some things we can't control in life. Too often in our lives we get caught up in trying to make things happen our way but in a storm, we aren't able to do this. We become passengers to a much bigger phenomenon and have to rely on others knowledge of the weather charts and area to be able to stay safe. It's the same with the storms of life. The best thing you can do when faced with a storm is to just give up the problem to God and trust he'll see you through. Like working through storm, it isn't easy, but you can be assured that he'll be with you every step of the way and if it's meant to be in life, he will guide us safely out of the thunder and lighting.


3. At the end of every storm, there is a rainbow and clear skies. Now I know this is the one
   
   I struggle with the most - especially when metaphorically you are being drenched and the thunder and lighting is all around you. There are times recently where I have really felt as if there was no end to the craziness, but it's important that all of us in these times continue to look towards the end goal and have hope. This is not only because we believe in a God who will always see us through, but also because when we do this, we focus our energies on getting through the problem. This is a key to overcoming a storm as unless we realise there's a problem and work towards solving it, nothing will ever change in life.
   
   

Storms are designed to be moments of amazing power and change - in just one severe storm, many trees can be destroyed which will in the long run allow them to re-generate and become even greater or weather patterns can be changed from a sweltering hot day to a cooler, more comfortable summer night.

The same goes with the storms of life. It won't be easy, but if we are willing to take a risk, trust God and ride the storm, then we give ourselves the opportunity to grow in not only our understanding of a situation, but also in ourselves as well, 

So what storms are in your life that you need to confront and see through? Make tonight the night you do something about them and set your life free for greatness.

Till next time,.,

P.S. stay tuned for a special bonus post this weekend - it's going to be a life changer.

What are you spending your time on...

Ok so I've just spent the last few days balancing my bank accounts and working on projects. Yeah I know it's not exciting, but I've put it off for far too long. Much like paying bills last week, it's time to get this stuff done.

In doing all of this though, a very interesting question was brought up. That question is, what am I spending my time doing that I am so busy that I can't do the necessary stuff.

As I thought about it in my head, I realised there were lots of really good things that I was spending my time on and here's a list of them.

• Working on plans to help bring people closer to Christ in their everyday life
• Spending quality time with family and friends
• Keeping fit and healthy
• Taking time out to relax and rewind

There were however also a lot of things that I know would be classified as 'time wasting', including...

• Looking for better versions of current apps to download on my tablet PC
• Spending way too much time on twitter news feed
• Watching mindless TV shows for hours on end
• Getting caught up in reading buzzfeed articles (seriously, they are so inviting!)

Now I don't think I'm alone here. I'm sure if you sat down and did this exact same assessment, you'd find things that you do that are worthwhile and things that really are not worth the time spent on them.

The problem is that even when we realise we are wasting time, it's just so easy to ignore the fact we are time wasting and just keep living life as we are. There's a comfort in doing the same thing over again and not having to deal with the fear of trying new things or changing routine.

This however is counter-productive in our relationship with God and our lives. By dedicating our lives to things of this earth, we don't use the God given talents  and we don't do what he is calling us to do. We also don't get important tasks done and end up either doing things half-baked or just not doing them at all  (such as my backpack that still sit in my parents house full of stuff from two years ago)!

While it is easier to take the wider road and be like the rest of society, as it says in the Bible, we are called to take the narrow road, no matter how much harder it is or longer it takes.

Practically that means that if I see a pile of dishes in the sink, then I should probably clean them, even if it may mean I have to delay watching that TV show for 20 mins - or if I know I have to write this blog, I should do it rather than delay it because I feel that I will be better spent looking at room designs or answering queries on Twitter.

Time is a precious thing and something that we cannot afford to waste. While God has his own time for everything - we still need to value the time he gives us and make sure every moment is used to make the world a better place - either through service, caring or changing lives for the better.

Yes we all need to rest sometimes and spend a few hours watching TV, especially when we are run down - we can't always be 100%. This however is about the excess, about ensuring that the time we have spare outside of our work and rest time is used to not benefit ourselves, but benefit the greater good.

So I ask the question once again - what are you spending your time on this week? Then I ask this - what are you going to do about it?

Till next time...

Lest we forget

Today marks the 100th anniversary of ANZAC Day - a time where we in Australia and New Zealand not only remember the battle of Gallipoli which began on this day back in 1915, but also the many men and women who have fought for our freedom over the many years as part of our defense forces.

It was great to see so many people this morning lining the streets of the local area I live in as those who have fought in combat for us or if they had passed on, their children and grandchildren walked down as part of the commemorative parade.

While this day is all about remembering the battles we've fought in and the efforts of our defense forces - it's not the dates that are the reason we remember. If it was only about remembering the day a battle had happen, the flame would have died out long ago.

ANZAC day is about remembering the values that make us who we are, that have been the building blocks of the two countries the name stands for and which even today we need a reminder about every once in a while.

For starters, there's the idea of sacrifice. Too often in our lives today, we see sacrifice as something horrible that we run away from because it's easier to live in comfort than to help out another or fight for something we believe in. In the lives of our defence men and women however, we see people who see sacrifice as something different.

To them, sacrifice is a beautiful gift of giving of ones self to help a greater cause, to truly show what they believe in and it is something that if required, they will do without question. These men and women and the lives they lead are a great example to us all of why sacrifice isn't such a bad thing and why we should all be more willing to do it.

Then there's the idea of service. We live in a world where everyone, including myself at times is just interested in themselves. We spend our days worrying about money, about how we are going to get what we need to get done and how much others are hindering that progress. In the stories from the war fields however, we see a different perspective on life.

As the Director of the Australian War Memorial, Dr Brendan Nelson said this morning - these men and women are never thinking of themselves first, even in their last moments as they lay wounded on the battlefield, it's always about what they can do for others that's in the forefront of their minds. Imagine if we were all like this, gave to others first no matter the cost, I am sure the world would be a better and happier place. As it says in the bible: "There is no greater love, than for a man to lay down his life for another."

Next, there's the idea of what being a hero is really about. We all have idealistic dreams of being heroes are and there's nothing wrong with that, even the boys who signed to WWI had those - it's probably why many took up the challenge. To us and to them, being a hero means doing a great thing and everyone loving you for it. The truth is though, that's not always the case and in particular was not the case with our ANZACs.

For all the sacrifice they made for their country, when many got home, they weren't treated like they are today with parades and celebration. If you were Indigenous after WWI you were an outcast, if you got ill, you were isolated and if you came back after Vietnam, the country wasn't particular fond of you. While a lot of this was injustice and is wrong, I view it as a great example for all of us in life. That no matter what you do, sometimes the accolades won't come, but that doesn't mean you don't do it anyway. We need to spend more time in life doing things without reward- something I know I struggle with but which in doing so, will lead to greater riches in Heaven,

Finally, the biggest thing I think we remember on ANZAC day is the power of mates. No matter whether what is written in war history is fact or exaggerated fable from fact, there's one thing that does remain true, and that is with all the battles, it has been our mateship that has seen us through. Aussies and Kiwis sticking together to get a job done and supporting each other no matter what has seen us win many more battles than we have lost over the years.

It's the same in life. We will win more battles than we will lose if we do things as a team, work to a common cause and support each other through all obstacles. It's a lot harder to do something by yourself but it's a lot easier and more likely to succeed when others are helping out. This applies to whether you are putting together a bed or fighting in the trenches. Whenever I see our defence personnel out in the field, I am reminded by this and days like today hopefully will instill this message into the generations to come as they read and learn about how these men through mateship overcame all.

May you be inspired by the ANZACs today to keep striving to live life to it's fullest and with an importance on what really matters - helping out others, giving of self no matter the accolades and always knowing that if you believe in what you are going for, it is always worth fighting for.

Lest we forget and till next time..

Time to move on...

Hi everyone!

Apologies once again for the gap in posts (seems like I should make this a monthly post LOL!)

Seriously though, I do apologise for the delay in writing and for not getting any more Lent posts up. I have recently moved and we didn't have internet for a whole month (another story for another day) but yes, now we have it, I'll be back online and hope to have a post for you every 2 weeks.

But yes, back to that news in the last paragraph- I've moved. It's not a spur of the moment thing, I've been planning to move for a few months now, but it's finally happened.

I haven't just moved down the road though, I've moved to the other side of the city and with that has brought many interesting experiences and adjustments to get use to being in a different location and in a different environment to the one I've become very use to.

Like any move, there's been the setting up of rooms, the travelling of stuff and the joy of having boxes around the place and never having any time to do anything with them. Along with this though, there's been the differences that take a bit of getting use to - like being at the Easter Triduum (for those who don't know what that is- it's the time between Holy Thursday and Easter Sunday) and not being in my home parish- having different ways of doing things and being in a different place in general when you are so use to being at the same place for so long can be a bit of a shock.

As the weeks go on however, I am getting more and more use to being in a new place and I feel as if it is now more home than my old place is. I am enjoying the new journeys and I am fortunate to have some great housemates which has made the whole thing even smoother than usual.

I write all this above as I think it relates very well to where I reckon a lot of you are as we head out of Lent and into this Easter season.

For many people, there were things that you did over Lent that were different to what you had done before (sacrifices made, attitudes changed) and you are not where you were when we started those 40 something days ago.

The problem with this is that now that Lent is over and you are once again able to do the things you could do before, there's a temptation to go back to what is comfortable and you know the outcome of - to slip back into bad habits or lose the progress made during this time in the desert.

This is not however what God has called us to. We are always called to something greater and to grow in ourselves and our ever deepening relationship with Christ.

Just like how for me, getting use to moving has taken time - so it is with you and your changes. For everyone of us, change is a difficult and at times scary thing - but it is so necessary if we want to keep growing and it is vital that we stick to the path, no matter how challenging it might become.

I've written before about how you need to keep going at something for it to become a habit and the same relates for the changes we have made over the Lenten period.

It is great to have given up chocolate, being angry, being more compassionate to others or to have begun to read more scripture or go to mass more often over these last few days, but if we don't keep on with this after Lent then we will miss out on our chance to grow as people of God.

To really see how God will work in your life, you need to take your Lenten promise and keep running with it for all of your life. It should become part of your psyche and another building block to your development as a Child of Christ.

Now I don't mean that if you've given up something, you must keep giving it up, but I do mean that you shouldn't go back to old ways.

For example, one of the things I did this Lent was I had a few weeks where I took a complete break from social media. Now while it is tempting to go back to spending every spare moment looking at Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, the truth is, I know how much of a waste of time that was and so I am now going to limit my time on these, knowing I'll be better off because of it.

If we are to be the Easter people God wants us to be, then we need to make sure that we keep alive the light that God calls us to carry- and that includes working to become the people we started to grow into over Lent.

Now that doesn't mean we aren't going to stumble every now and then - that's human nature but we know from Christ rising for us that he won't ever not be there for us and in these times, we need to turn to him and then keep powering on.

So don't let the work you've done over Lent go by and in the process lose the real value of Easter and Resurrection Day. Make this be your move to a greater and better life- as God intended it to be.

Praying for you all and till next time...

The real value of Lent - Part 1

Hi everyone,

Firstly, apologies for the delay in this post and I hope that you are all having an inspired Lenten season so far.

Yes, for those who didn't realise yet - we are now in the season of Lent. It's a time where generally
people give up a lot of stuff, then go into a period of mourning over the loss of what they had like they've lost a loved one!

Now before anyone gets offended by that last sentence, I wasn't being serious and it's certainly not the truth. Sometimes however, the way people act during Lent can make it seem like this and to be honest, while it's ok to have some self pity, too much of it, especially during Lent, can take away from the real value of the season.

But wait you might be asking, isn't the value of Lent to give up something so that we can feel pain in our hearts due to the sacrifice we make?

The answer is well, no, it's not. The problem is that this is what we think Lent is all about - however it's about something so much more.

The scriptures say in Matthew 6:16-18

"And whenever you fast, do not look dismal, like the hypocrites, for they disfigure their faces so as to show others that they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward. But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, so that your fasting may be seen not by others but by your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you."

In this passage, Jesus shows us two things:

1. We need to be humble when fasting and giving in sacrifice
2. There is more to fasting than just the act of giving up something, otherwise Jesus would be telling us to look sad so that everyone could see us.

So if we are meant to act normally when we sacrifice something, then why are we sacrificing at all? Isn't the aim of sacrifice to show how we're giving up something for a greater good?

Well the answer to that is yes, sacrifice is meant to show how we're giving up something for the greater good - but not to others, rather to our own hearts and souls.

I remember growing up at Lent, I use to give up all sorts of things. Gave up chocolate, pizza, ice cream and so much more. I even remember one year giving up being mean to people.

The problem was though, that come Easter Sunday, I'd either gorge on food, or get back into bad habits pretty quickly and to me, it seemed like Lent then became a pointless exercise, much in the same way a person feels after having done six weight loss diets and seeing no result.

The thing that was missing though, was that every time I sacrificed something, I didn't do it with any purpose in mind. I just decided I'd sacrifice something because it's what you do at Lent.

The real value of Lent is that our sacrifice is meant to draw us closer to God, not just through being able to experience the sacrifice Jesus felt on the cross, but through making us focus on areas of our lives that we wouldn't normally take time to focus on when there's other distractions in our lives.

Now that's a big thought there, so let me simplify it a little. Say for example you are fasting from food during days of Lent -whenever you feel hungry, instead of focusing on how hungry you are, you can think about how people around the world have to live like this everyday, or how you value food over things that perhaps have more importance like family or God's will in your life.

The aim of sacrifice for God is not to experience pain, it's to discover that what we have that's earthly is meaningless compared to what God call us to and what he wants us to be. Growing in compassion, increasing in mercy or gaining value in the God given gifts of life are all part of the real value of giving more of the self to God during Lent.

The thing is though, we can't give more of ourselves if we are cluttering our minds with all sorts of stuff from the world. It's why we need times like Lent, to be able to have the idea of giving to God at the forefront of our minds and to take time away to really focus on God and his amazing work in our lives. Even though we might be giving up something small or taking up something more on top of what we have (more on that in weeks to come), what he has in store for us from doing that in a faithful way is so much more rewarding than what we gave up could ever be.

I wish you all the very best for whatever decisions you make during this Lenten season and may God continue to bless you always.

Till next time...

Don't take things to heart and don't let them get the better of you

Hi all,

Today, I want to focus on a topic of conflict because if you look in the media or even around you in your own lives at this very moment - you'd have to agree it's something we don't handle all that well.

In the past, if I got into a conflict with someone, I would have gotten annoyed at the person for making me feel unhappy and I'd have held it against them for months if not years. Now I know it sounds stupid and to be honest, it was but I know I'm not the only one who deals with issues like this. It's the reason why we have revenge and wars, it's the reason why relationships fail and it's the reason why so many of us don't get to where we want to in life.

So, what exactly do we do when we either are hurt by others or others go off at us for the mistakes we make. Well here's a few tips I have learnt over the last few years that I hope will help you with this and more importantly, help you to keep living the life you deserve to live, one filled with happiness and joy.

• Be willing to be humble - First and foremost, we must be willing to realise that we will make mistakes and we need to learn from them. Those who struggle the most in life are the ones who try to blame everything on everyone else. This isn't because they lose friends, but because they never get to see the value in owning up to your mistakes. While it may hurt at the time to be yelled or spoken poorly to for something you've done wrong, if you know you've made a mistake, it's better to apologise for a mistake and move on then try to take the high ground. While the other person may still be angry with you even after you apologise, if you can show in your actions that you are working to fix the mistakes you've made, they will see that and be more likely to give you the benefit of another chance.



• Realise it's not always about you - The other day I had someone blow up at me for something
  
  that I'd done which I thought was rather small. Now while I did get annoyed at first, I quickly calmed down when I started to think about how busy this person was doing lots of really important tasks and how much stress they probably where under at that time. It's important that before we go into automatic defense of ourselves mode, that we take a step back and see the real reason why a person is angry at us. Is it because of a mistake that we made which was an error in our judgement or maybe it's because we just added to their bad day. If it's the latter, then there's a good chance you didn't cause the them to get that angry, you're just in the line of fire for an issue that is unresolved in the other persons life. We need to not feel as if every attack on us is solely because we are being targeted, but see that there are other influences that can cause people to get upset.



• Remember that everyone makes mistakes - If you read any information about how to overcome
  
  conflict, one of the first things it will say to you is that forgiveness is the key to moving forward from tough situations. Sometimes however, it can be really hard to forgive others when they've hurt you and in those moments, this third point can be a lifesaver. It's all about realising that while the person around you may have hurt you, there's a good chance that if you look back at your day, you've probably been just as frustrated or annoyed at someone or something. We are all human, we all get annoyed sometimes - whether that's in front of people's faces or like me, in my mind while getting stuck in peak hour traffic. It's the flaw that's been around since the fall of man and the sooner we realise that we are all like this, and that no one is perfect, the sooner we will be able to give leeway to each other and realise that people don't make mistakes because they want to, they do it because they are flawed, just like we are and we need to be able to love them through that.



• Take time out - If you're busy with a million things and you don't do this, I can guarantee you
  
  from personal experience that the little things in life that would normally just annoy you, will cause you to seethe and probably get you into a confrontation with someone or something that you will regret. Instead of just allowing this to happen, make sure that if you're having a busy week, you make time to take time out to go for a walk (even for five minutes). Walking clears the mind and allows you to focus your energies on something other than the tasks at hand. I know this is hard, as I struggle to do it all the time, but we need to take breaks to cut through the issues of the world and go back to seeing the beauty in it, for once we see the beauty in the world, its issues don't ever seem nearly as bad.



• Be willing to change - We all get hurt sometimes and that's a part of human life, but no one deserves to be hurt physically or emotionally by the same person over a duration of time. After
  
  all I've said above, I'm going to say this- if you are in a continually toxic relationship with someone (whether romantic, work related or otherwise) you do not have to accept it. While we have to accept people for who they are, they also have a responsibility to change and if they don't, well, then we have every right to move on somewhere else. Do not ever feel that you need to stay in an abusive or detrimental situation for any reason. This also goes for if you have done the first four points and things still stay the same. Firstly speak to the person about how you're feeling and then if you get no change after that, then look elsewhere. You deserve to be able to be free, proud and happy to be yourself always. There are always going to be dark and tough days, but if those become months and years, then get out and do something that brings the sun to your life, because you were made for that and deserve nothing less.

Know I'm praying for you all in this and keep striving to resolve the conflicts in your life- it will be so much better for you doing so.

Until next time...